Monday, August 31, 2009

Don't Put All Your Adages in One Basket

I tend to procrastinate these vacation posts as they tend to be long-winded and not that interesting to anyone besides me. I have to force myself to be brief, and I never like being brief. But here is my attempt.

My flight out to Utah: it was me and my two girls going alone since Codeman had to work. I flew Delta, therefore you can probably guess what happened without me going into much detail. The girls and a very pregnant I (I threw the 'very' in there for dramatic effect) were stuck over night in Georgia through no fault of our own. You know the drill, stand in an airport line until 1:30 at night with two crazy kids who refuse to go to sleep, get shuttled to a hotel, blah, blah, blah, wear the same clothes the next day, haunt the airport the next day, waiting to fly out. It was actually fine; I mean, not a picnic or anything like that, but not as terrible as it could have been. One of the most annoying things about the whole experience was listening to the conversation behind me in the line, as I waited to get new tickets and a hotel room for the night. The guy behind me just couldn't quite grasp that time travel isn't possible. "If I would have known I was gonna be stuck here for the night, I would have stayed an extra night at my grandma's house" (this is a grown man, by the way). Or, the same guy, "I could have driven home in as much time as this is going to take." And then he would follow up these incredibly pointless musings with incredibly stupid adages. "But, you know, it is what it is." "Whatcha gonna do?" "Just have to grin and bear it." And there I was, pregnant (very, did I mention), standing in line with my two wily kids running around (which is putting it mildly), and I had to listen to this man, all by his lonesome, whine, complain, and then console himself with greeting card messages. I had a couple adages I would have liked to offer him, "Life is full of disappointments.", "Cowboy up.", "Listening to your voice makes me want to pull my earlobes into my mouth and gag on them." (what, you haven't heard that adage before?)

So much for me being brief.

We finally arrived in Utah, stayed a week with my in-laws on their farm in Utah. Claire loved playing with her cousins, and all the animals that Grandma and Grandpa have. Claire threw up, Morgan thought that she and the kitty-a-cat were soul mates, and I read a book.

There, that was brief.

And then we went to my sister's house, spent a couple of days laughing until it hurt, then went to Bear Lake for a few days for a family reunion on my side. Loved it! Got colored a toasty shade of red. The kids loved the Harry Potter themed activities, including a potions class that I taught. As a family, collectively ate three batches of Scotch-a-roos. Went back to my sister's house, visited some friends, ate a peanut buster parfait, put a puzzles together, flew home. That's about it.

I had a great time. Claire had an even better time. She was in heaven being able to play all day long with her cousins. Morgan screamed anytime it was time to eat, fought with her 18 month old cousin, and sang "I Know You" about 147 times.

And the rest is history; we rode off into the sunset; all good things must end sometime; these mashed potatoes are so creamy; and that, as they say, is that; that's the way the cookie crumbles; you can't make an omlet without breaking an egg, any cook will tell you that; that closes the curtain on this case; dweeb-da-da-da-dweeb, dat's all folks.

(Morgan, looking totally presentable, on Grandma and Grandpa's farm)



(the view from the patio of our cabin at Bear Lake)



(Claire, with her wand and Slytherin cape, probably coming up with some evil-genius plan)




(me, teaching a rockin' potions class. I even yelled at the kids, just like Professor Snape. I am the best aunt on the planet.)

13 comments:

tharker said...

I'm so impressed that you didn't turn around and tell whiny man off. I don't know if I would have been able to control my mouth at 1:30am.

We loved seeing you and the girls so much. The only thing that could have made it better was if Cody could have been there. We missed him (no one more than Spencer and Al, I'm sure...fishing anyone?).

Your adages are killing me! And yes, you are the best Potions teacher ever! My kids loved it, especially when you did your best impression of Professor Snape.

Okay, maybe some of the kids didn't like it, but "you can't win 'em all" (just another adage to add to your basket)

Cara said...

My dear Brooke, you are amazing. You made a vacation post not only amusing, but entertaining. You got skills girl. And just so you know, I did catch the "While You Were Sleeping" quote. I missed all the others, but I caught that one.

Elise said...

Ok so the Potions class looks really fun and so does the rest of your vacation. I don't understand why its so complicated to fly anywhere. I would rather listen to some annoying man whine and complain than have to fly. You had to do both with two kids by yourself and pregnant...you should win an award.

Shells said...

I caught "while you were sleeping", "Bruce Almighty," and porky the pig. Clever.

How are we going to top this years reunion? It was the best. I mean, maybe we could go through 4 pans of scotch-a-roos next year. That would be a start.

HARKfield said...

you can't make an omlet without breaking an egg, any cook will tell you that, ....... but look what happened to the cook!

Monica said...

Really? Was it only 3 pans of scotch-a-roos, because I would swear that it was more. Didn't we make another batch at my house after Bear Lake? No matter the number of pans, it was a great time had by all. How will we top it next year?

And really, I kept expecting a, "To make a long story short", in your post but was a tad disappointed. Hmm.

libby said...

I love it. honestly, where do you come up with this stuff?

Three things:
1. of course you were flying Delta when something bad happened while traveling. they're stupid.
2. you handled the situation much better than I.
3. maybe you should teach a potions class in orlando. :)

Linda said...

You are one brave prego-woman to travel with two kids on DELTA! Your trip did look like lots of fun though. Bear Lake looks beautiful! Can you believe I've never been there?

Liz said...

I am impressed that you could pull up all those adages! Did you look those up? I wish my brain had that many memory cells. :0)

P.S. You ARE the coolest Aunt with your potions class! That sounds so awesome.

Pitcherpost said...

Can i hire you to write my blog posts? I'll supply the pictures, you do the words, maybe I'll have something worth checking then!

Your family reunions crack me up! you guys really go all out, so it was harry potter themed this year? very cute. I'm impressed. I wish I could have seen your professor snape impression!

You barely look pregnant. you suck :) I mean, I'm happy you looks so good...I have that shirt you were wearing in your potions instructions, expcept it looks much better on your skinny arms.

Sorry about your awful traveling experience! It wouldn't be so bad if kids were glued to you, but trying to keep two busy kids in your sight..so stressful. You might have gotten more sympathy if people could actually tell you were pregnant :)

Rachel said...

love it. i LOL'd so much at this post. Sorry you had the overnight. that is terrible. they should give you a million dollars for that. or pesos at least. what a drag.

Lisa said...

I found your blog through Stacee's. I hope you don't mind that I've "blog-stalked" you. I had so much fun seeing you and your beautiful kids at your family reunion! I was thrilled that you guys were getting together so close to where I live so I could see my long-lost cousins again. I haven't seen you since I was about 5, but hey! We're cousins! I would love to continue to read your fun dialog and feel free to check out my blog, www.thespeerfam.blogspot.com. I'm not nearly as witty as you are, but it's all I've got!

Bethany said...

You are such a trooper. Family reunions. Gotta love all the drama, fun,adventure,misfortunes,cousin times, and family games. Looks like you had a beautiful view to look out at when the sun was setting. That would make it all worth it.